Relationship Advice to Keep the Spark Alive
There are many ways to keep the excitement and interest alive in a relationship and most of these ways focus on the interaction between two partners. There are other indirect ways which can be very effective in rejuvenating relationships. One of them I will touch upon now and concerns not an outwardly direction of attention to the partner, but instead a change in direction of your own life path.
It sounds a bit dramatic, but really it is nothing more than making better use of your talent in various areas to increase your ability to experience life’s rich variety of creative activities. The theory is that by increasing your own knowledge and skills in areas which fulfil you, you will then pass on the increased feeling of well-being to your partner. As well as being more emotionally self-sufficient, you reduce the emotional baggage on your partner that you bring to the relationship. By this I mean that many people expect their partner to fix all their problems and be a leaning post for everything that goes wrong. Instead, learn how to bring into your life emotional experiences that do not depend on your partner… in essence, by doing so you are not draining your other half’s energy, but instead replenishing it. This in turn will lead to an increased sense of well-being in your partner which could then be reflected positively back to you. In short, both of you will benefit and the relationship will potentially enter a deeper phase of understanding and mutual love. Many people prefer their partner to have interests outside of their own… it leads to a more rounded, less clingy relationship, which is far more healthy.
Another benefit of doing various activities/hobbies which fulfil you is that you have an increased base of knowledge and interests from which to talk about. You will feel more confident as you become competent in your hobby and this will lead to renewed focus on the topics in your conversations which interest you and could help your partner respect you even more. An upshot of this is the possibility that your partner could even show an interest and he too could benefit from following similar hobbies.
All in all, gaining experience in what life has to offer and becoming adept at a few fulfilling skills can work wonders for your self-esteem and independence. This in turn can lead to your partner feeling less pressure and actually feeling more love towards you. Many people are turned off by a partner who is too dependent on them as it creates an artificially high level of pressure for them to support their partner. By removing this pressure and showing that you have an intellectual, creative side that empowers you, you may just find that your partner is impressed, relieved, proud and ultimately even happier to have you in her/his life.
SO what hobbies would achieve all this? Anything which fulfills you. It would be even better if some of your hobbies your partner could even share with you (though beware encroaching on their ’spare’ time and this could backfire and you could be accussed of meddling in their life a little too much). I would recommend an interest which fulfills you emotionally as well as offers some sort of interaction with others. For instance, the following list should provide some ideas on what many people do to enrich their lives:
- painting
- poetry
- writing
- photography
- knitting
- debating clubs
- dancing
- politics
- history
- horse riding
- flower arranging
- kite flying
- running
- book of the month club
- singing
- sculpture
- glass-blowing
- fine arts
- jewellery making
- golf
- yoga
- martial art
The list could be nearly endless. The choice is yours, so go out and make yourself more fulfilled, more confident, stronger and more interesting… and watch your relationship reinvigorate itself.